My Twelve Days of Christmas

On the first day of Christmas my true love gave to me:
A bestseller in a pear tree

On the second day of Christmas my true love gave to me:
Abs like Brooklyn Decker
And a bestseller in a pear tree

On the third day of Christmas my true love gave to me:
Lunch with J.K. Rowling
Abs like Brooklyn Decker
And a bestseller in a pear tree

On the fourth day of Christmas my true love gave to me:
Lobster agnolotti
Lunch with J.K. Rowling
Abs like Brooklyn Decker
And a bestseller in a pear tree

On the fifth day of Christmas my true love gave to me:
Domination over Word!
Lobster agnolotti
Lunch with Joanne
Abs like Brooklyn Decker
And a bestseller in a pear tree

On the sixth day of Christmas my true love gave to me:
A 1966 Mustang
Domination over Word!
Lobster agnolotti
Lunch with Joanne
Abs like Brooklyn Decker
And a bestseller in a pear tree

On the seventh day of Christmas my true love gave to me:
A first serve like Serena
The one with the pony windows
Kicking Word’s butt!
Lobster anything
Hanging out with Jo
Abs like Brooklyn Decker
And a bestseller in a pear tree

On the eighth day of Christmas my true love gave to me:
Rich’s scary glasses
A first serve like Serena
Manual transmission
Word is my b—h!
Lobster ’til I’m sick
Hanging out with Jo
Abs like Brooklyn Decker
And a bestseller in a pear tree

On the ninth day of Christmas my true love gave to me:
Shooting guns with Kat
Rich’s scary glasses
A first serve like Serena
White leather interior
Word is my b—h!
Lobster everything
Hanging out with Jo
Abs like Brooklyn Decker
And a bestseller in a pear tree

On the tenth day of Christmas my true love gave to me:
A European sojourn
Shooting guns with Kat
Rich’s scary glasses
A first serve like Serena
Shiny black ‘Stang
Word is my b—h!
Feed me lobster, please
Chilling with Jo
Abs like Brooklyn Decker
And a bestseller in a pear tree

On the eleventh day of Christmas my true love gave to me:
Cocktails with George Clooney
A European sojourn
Blasting cans with Kat
Rich’s scary glasses
A first serve like Serena
I really want that car
Word is my b—h!
Yummy lobster rolls
Chilling with Jo
Abs like Brooklyn Decker
And a bestseller in a pear tree

On the twelfth day of Christmas my true love gave to me:
Peace within my family
Cocktails with George Clooney
A European Sojourn
Blasting stuff with Kat
Rich’s scary glasses
A first serve like Serena
Don’t forget the Mustang
Word is my b—h!
Lobster agnolotti
Bffs with Jo
Abs like Brooklyn Decker
And a bestseller in a pear tree

 

Author: L. A. Lewandowski

Lois Lewandowski graduated from Rutgers University with a degree in Political Science and French Literature. A passion for life lived well is reflected in her novels, Born to Die-The Montauk Murders, A Gourmet Demise, and My Gentleman Vampire, giving readers a glimpse into the world of the beau monde. Lois lives in Tampa, Florida. Learn more at her lifestyle blog, and her Amazon author page.

19 thoughts on “My Twelve Days of Christmas”

  1. I hope you get all that you want for Christmas, Lois. In he spirit of fun, my personal feelings on your little ditty:

    Peace with my family… hmmm… we used to all go to my mum’s, for just about every special occasion, including Christmas; I haven’t seen most of them since her funeral in 2004.

    Cocktails with George? He’s a pretty cool guy, I could dig that.

    The European sojourn? Yeah I suppose so… done it to death though!

    Blasted plenty of stuff, to be honest I’m over it now; I didn’t know Kat was a gun nut but now you mention it she does portray all the signs.

    Rich’s glasses, well… what can I say?

    I certainly wouldn’t like to be receiving Serena’s first serve, that’s for sure.

    Never owned a Mustang but I sold a couple when I worked at ‘Horseless Carriages’ in Sydney in 83, and I did have a ‘66’ Light Blue, 357, auto, as a drive car for a couple of weeks before I sold it.

    I misread the next one at first (reading it as Domination over the world), eyesight getting a little dim, either that or the mind starting to go west; whichever, I’m not sure I get it?

    Lobster: you’ve got me with anything sea food!

    Lunch with JK Rowling? That would be interesting.

    Got the abs, had them most of my life, they’re getting a bit old now but still there.

    I don’t need to comment on the ‘Best Seller in a pear tree’; that speaks for itself.

    Nice, festive post, Lois.

  2. Hello, T.D.!
    Lol. I love your interpretation of my post.
    My daughter would always say, “I dominated the audition” when she was in musical theatre. I have been trying, valiantly, to learn Word, and often need to seek remedial help. My desire to dominate is reserved to only a few areas in my life, Word software being one of them. A really smoking serve would be another.
    I adored that Mustang. It had white leather interior and was pretty much stock. If I ever make a lot of money I’m going to find the exact same one.
    The ab reference … I work very hard on mine but I think my cooking interferes. 🙂
    Merry Christmas and Happy Holiday to you and yours. I’m glad you liked the post. My last one was too depressing for the holiday season.

  3. Hilarious. I also misread the WORD domination thing at first as WORLD domination. Sorta reminds me of the old Steve Martin SNL thing “If I had only one wish for the world…” Heh. World domination works for me. Peace out. That’s an order.

Comments are closed.