Day: May 14, 2012

Sorry, We Can’t Use Funny by Barry Parham

Author Barry Parham

Not long ago, I wrote a book. I didn’t mean to – I had to. Somehow, I had managed to snub a minor deity, and I had to set things right.

I knew I didn’t have what it takes to write a novel. I’m missing a few essentials: a plot, a plan, intimacy with a bunch of interesting characters, vocabulary, discipline, talent.

No, I wanted to write something less dramatic, something more useless, something that lets me get away with gross grammatical gaffes like, for example, the previous paragraph. I wanted to write a weekly commentary and then find some newspaper to carry it, so I could get out of the numbing habit of actually working.

And so, for a while, I tried writing stuff and contacting newspapers all across America. But the newspapers kept telling me to get out of the way so they could finish dying.

So it didn’t go well, and now I focus on writing other things: online columns, long parole violation rationalizations, extended grocery shopping lists. Continue reading “Sorry, We Can’t Use Funny by Barry Parham”

Book Marketing Tips for Authors

K. S. Brooks
What’s it gonna take to get you to buy this book?

There has been a lot of complaining recently about authors who “overmarket” their books like used car salesmen yelling full blast in our faces. This, of course, raises the question: what exactly IS acceptable? Technically, only you can answer that – if you care not to alienate or oversell, the key to making that determination is really “treat others as you would like to be treated yourself.”

That said, I do have some tips for newbies and all authors which will make your efforts more tolerable for those receiving them, and more rewarding for you in return.

#1 – Post book excerpts. Choose a day each week as your book excerpt day. This works great for Twitter and even better if you have Twitter set up to post automatically to your Facebook and other profiles. One Tweet, many social platforms. Not sure exactly what type of excerpt to use? I like to mix it up. Some weeks I’ll just tweet all prepositions or adverbs. Sure, anyone can tweet a sentence. What’s the point in doing that? Continue reading “Book Marketing Tips for Authors”

Could try harder – C+

Author Carol Wyer
Author Carol Wyer

Having spoken to several budding novelists at Creative Writing Groups in recent weeks it has become apparent that many writers lack confidence in their ability. They have written their story or novel but are worried that it is not good enough to be published.

Well, if you have a finished product you should banish these anxieties. Of course, you could always show it to your mother. She’d probably tell you it is fantastic, unless she’s like my mother who is more likely to chew it up like a rabid pit-bull terrier and tell you to try harder.

If you can’t face criticism from those you know then how about some criticism from those who don’t know you? Even better than that, how about some constructive criticism from other writers?

After I finished Mini Skirts and Laughter Lines I didn’t know what to do next. I didn’t dare show my work to friends because I didn’t want to put them on the spot. After all, who wants to tell a friend that the novel they have just spent a year writing is awful? Continue reading “Could try harder – C+”