Two people can experience the same event and walk away with completely different opinions of what they just shared. If you don’t believe me, then take your spouse to a Hugh Grant movie. One of you will love it and the other won’t. And while you both may be moved to tears during the movie, I can assure you it will be for different reasons. Please note that I have nothing against Hugh Grant or his movies. It was just an example, so save the hate mail.
On second thought send the hate mail. It’s been a hectic week and I could use a laugh. The point I’m trying to make is that we all perceive things differently. This is important to remember if you are a new writer or happen to find yourself watching a Hugh Grant movie.
Your perception is your reality. To change that reality you must first change the perception. Wow, that almost sounded profound. But how does it relate to you, the aspiring writer? Good question, and I’m glad you asked.
As an author in training there will be dozens of pitfalls that will keep you from following your dream of writing. Many of these obstacles are a matter of perception. Let me share some examples.
Fear
One of the most debilitating things for a new writer is fear. Whether it’s the fear of rejection, failure, or just putting yourself out there in front of strangers, it can stop you before you even get started.
My biggest fear was centered around the mechanics and technical aspects of writing. Just because I know the difference between “there”, “their” and “they’re”, or “then” and “than”, does not mean I’m qualified to write a book. The perception that I was not skilled in the craft held me back for many years. This was my reality. In order to change that reality I first had to change my perception.
Who gives a crap if I’ve had no formal training or experience as a fiction writer? Everyone had to start somewhere. And while it’s been a long time since I’ve sat in a classroom and listened to a teacher talk about proper grammar, punctuation and syntax, that doesn’t preclude me from learning it all over again. Yes, I still have a long way to go, but I’ll be damned if I let someone tell me I can’t do something, including myself. My perception went from being an aspiring author to an author in training.
Time
This is a roadblock that most people can relate to. How many of us have too many hours in the day? Writers need time to write. The lack of time is probably an excuse that a few of you have used at some point, and it’s kept you from starting on the novel you’ve dreamed of writing. Again, it a perception issue. At least it was in my case.
To say that I stay busy would be an understatement. Sure, there might be an hour or two in the day that I could squeeze in some writing time, but that was never really enough. Some days were just too busy. When I did manage to find some time, I made the mistake of editing what I wrote previously. There were weeks where I managed to write a thousand words only to scratch them out and write it over. Inevitably my dream would come to a screeching halt.
The perception was that I didn’t have the kind of time it would take to complete a novel. For awhile it seemed that I would need to quit or retire in order to chase this writing dream.
My job requires travel; the majority of which is by car. Each week I spend anywhere between three and twelve hours driving from one location to the next. Last year during one of these road trips I had an epiphany. Why couldn’t I work on the novel while I drove around? From that point on I started finding little breaks in the day to concentrate on writing. You can write anywhere, even when you’re not writing. Sounds like an oxymoron, but it’s true.
Once my perception changed about the time I had available to write, the priorities in my life changed as well. Yes, it’s still a struggle. There are days that I don’t get to sit in front of the computer, but I’m writing nonetheless. If you think that you don’t have time then change your perception or change your priorities. You will make time for writing if this is what you really want to do.
Reality
If you find that your current reality is not letting you follow your dreams, then change it. Often this is just a matter of how you perceive things to be. An attitude adjustment can go a long way towards achieving your goals.
Although, if you happen to find yourself sitting in a movie theater with the prospect of watching Hugh Grant bumble around for two hours, there’s not much you can do to change your perception. Just suck it up and face the fact that your reality bites for the moment.
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K.D. Rush is a Contributing Author for Indies Unlimited. He is currently working on a book of short stories, as well as his debut novel, The Guild Inc., a supernatural thriller. For more information please see the IU Bio page and visit his website: http://KDRush.com or find him on Twitter @KD_Rush.[subscribe2]
Very nice post, KD, and you cover a lot of those points very well. If I can add:
"Fear" – every biz is showbiz these days, and although writers used to be able to get away with being aloof and distant sages, those days are over; new writers especially have to put themselves out there to some degree and run the risk of personal rejection, as well as professional rejection.
"Time" – it's very important to think constantly about your current novel, and in the car is as good a place as any other. Problems come up again with the showbiz side of being a writer: when you've been thinking about the next scene, plot twist, etc but then have to respond on social networks. The buzz of interacting in real time (chilling and having a laugh) can really derail the most rigid writing schedule.
"Reality" – this requires the most self-discipline. If you don't have a publisher and a deadline or a few thousand fans waiting for your next book, it's very easy to feel sorry for yourself and ask "What's the point?" and go back to social networking, because the people there are for the most part very nice. And that's without seeing self-published books of the most trite "stories", with appalling editing and use of English, out-selling your own books. You really need a thick skin on those days.
My biggest issue seems to be time at the moment. Though I did manage to sneak in a few hours of writing this weekend, between some video rendering.
Social networking is a pitfall all unto itself. While it's a necessary tool to build your platform, it can also be addicting. Unless I need to do research, the Internet is turned off while writing.
It's a lonely job, and having a support group can help. One of the great things about the indie community is the level of encouragement from those that have been there, or are going through the same things you are.
Writing a good story is part of the recipe for success. I've read some books that were very successful by indie standards that ended up putting me to sleep though.
While I've no illusion that my stories will ever win a Pulitzer, I firmly believe that I can market a book well enough to have it be moderately successful. Even if I fail, at least I can say that I tried.
Nice post KD,
The one thing we are all in control of is our perception and attitude. Change those and you can do anything … well, you know what I mean … almost anything.
Thanks Jim. The poster I have framed on my wall reads, "Attitude is a little thing that makes a big difference."
Then again, I also have http://goo.gl/w4vI0 as a screensaver.
Right, Jim! If we are to attain anything, we must first be able to perceive it.
Rush – I LOVE this line – "If you find that your current reality is not letting you follow your dreams, then change it." Well said. 🙂
Thanks KS. My reality is a bit skewed at times due to my perceptions. Having grown up with role models such as Elvis, Dracula, and Fred Flintstone gives me an interesting philosophy on life.
🙂
Heh. My role models were Chuck Connors as the Rifleman, and Diana Rigg as Emma Peel in the Avengers. LOL. No worries, my friend!
Time, oh boy. I thought I'd beaten the fear but the time excuse just covers up for it instead. A printout of this post is going on my wall as an all-seeing excuse buster. But, I can't abide Hugh Grant, is that ok?
Thanks Carolyn. I'm sure Hugh has enough fans to go around without the likes of us.
😉
There are many pitfalls that a new writer can run into. Most of these seem to fall under the categories of 'time & fear' though. We can write, or we can make excuses for why we don't write.
Thanks for the comment, and keep trucking!
"Social networking is a pitfall all unto itself."
Corresponding with other authors who we meet in various social networks can absorb a great deal of time, but brings inspiration and shared insights.
What I've learned to resist is engaging in time-wasting argument with others who perceive "things" quite differently.
What is so refreshing about the posts here on Indies Unlimited, is how rarely that takes place.
Agreed Marcia! The Indie author community is one of the best, especially here. The people that stop by and hang out at this site have always been helpful and courteous. And I love the snarky humor. 😉
Yeah, it's a great mix, isn't it? The snark is at exactly the right levels. It remains supportive, useful, and funny without being self important.
The comment section is one of my favorite parts of the site. I can't tell you how many new blogs or books I've found as a result of people stopping by to share a thought or two. The fact that some of those comments made me laugh is just icing on the cake.
Exactly.
Most excellent post sir, even if you are make your points at the expense of dear Hugh in all his Hughness!
I think you are right naming fear as the number one obstacle for us 'newish' writers. You've said everything I would want to say…but I'll add that, as corny as MANY people will think it, I often think on words from that poem "Desiderata" that became fashionable in the 70's. Remember "Go placidly among the noise and haste…"? Yes I can quote the whole thing but I won't here, don't worry! There is a line that goes: "If you compare yourself with others, you may become vain or bitter; for always there will be greater and lesser persons than yourself."
I know there will always be better writers and worse writers than me. Really understanding that gave me the freedom to be able to change my perception and make writing my new reality.
"The only thing we have to fear, is fear itself." -FD Roosevelt
I applaud your new reality! Fear is a difficult thing to overcome. It still gives me the shivers when I think of riding in an airplane. But, I won't let that stop me from getting a pilots license one of these days.
There is a time and place for fear. It can be used, wielded like a shield to protect us from dangerous consequences, but it must be balanced with the sword of courage. Those that refuse to fight their fear will always lose.
Time is definitely my struggle. So I'll keep this reply short.
Great post, my friend.
TY David!
😉
I always wished the word "succinct" were shorter. Why not one syllable, you know?
Changed reality. Now cowering in corner of apartment. Couches are fucking mean. I hate them. They know. I have no trust for them any more. Let me open this door and…………
Great post Kat!
JD, I'm pretty sure that the daily dosage is lower than what you're currently taking. How's the foot bro? 😉
Great post, K.D. Like Kat, I love the line “If you find that your current reality is not letting you follow your dreams, then change it.” Mindset dictates what we do or don't do, whether we find success or whether we fail. This is in part the theme of my book "A Graveyard of Dreams: Breathing New Life into Buried Dreams". And no, I'm not trying to promote the book here. It won't even be available for a few months. But it is an important point to remember as a writer. Frequent attitude checks are important, and we can change the outcome concerning the dream if we make the right effort.
Thanks Diane! It sounds like you've already seen what it took me years to realize. Please feel free to jump in with any excerpt from your book when it's relevant to the topic. I more than welcome it!
Thanks for stopping by and taking the time to post your thoughts. It's always great to hear from you!
All negative emotions have elements of either fear or anger. When we face those and put them where they belong (daily, several times a day) we begin to prevent it from causing that inertia the holds us back from stepping towards our dreams. But it's a constant struggle. And it's why we come together here – to get that little nudge that breaks the hold fear has on us.
Yvonne, well put my friend. The indie author community is one of the most open, accepting, encouraging groups that I've ever been a part of. And the people here are some of the best.
Great post.
You do know you look like a M.I.B. agent, right?
Not sure I'd like to meet him emerging from a black limo. "Get in! The boss wants to see you." lol
You guys! 😉
90% of my wardrobe is in the color of black. Outside of a few dress shirts and a couple of T-shirts that were given to me, it's the only color I wear. The next most predominant color is purple. 😉
Someone at work called me Johnny Cash the other day. After nearly six years, you would think that these people would be used to the way I dress by now.
True story…
When I was old enough to start dressing myself, my mother would be shocked at the color combinations that I would have on. Many times she would make me go change, telling me what went with what.
It didn't help that I'm partially color blind. Blues and blacks run together for me, same for yellow and white, red/orange/pink all look about the same.
When I got a job in high school I made a decision that picking out clothes to wear would be a simple process; just buy all black. Sometimes a blue would slip in there by mistake, but for the better part of the past thirty years this is how I've dressed.
😉
What do you know about M.I.B.? More importantly, where did you hear about it? (slides the sunglasses on) Okay, just let me show you something really neat. Look right here.
What?
Do I know you?
Exactly. 😉